Can’t Give What You Don’t Have

Hey Team! All right, here we are again. What a beautiful week, what a beautiful day. I wanted to share with you—I don’t know how many of you have ever read anything by C.S. Lewis. I’ve been reading a little bit more by him recently, seeing quotes and different things. C.S. Lewis wrote “The Lion, the Witch, and the Wardrobe” along with dozens of other works. Maybe some of you in school read “The Lion, the Witch, and the Wardrobe.” Maybe you saw the movie. I don’t know. He said that no generation can bequeath to its successors what it has not got.

I think about that. And it’s like, I can’t give and impart to my family, my kids, what I don’t have. I can’t make them generous if I’m not generous. If I don’t model generosity to them. Then they won’t be generous. If I don’t model love, they won’t be loving. If I don’t model self-control, they won’t be self-controlled. You can’t give a legacy to others. It’s the same thing within the company. I can’t expect our team leaders and team members to be generous and caring for one another if I’m not generous and caring towards them.

I can’t give them what I don’t have. No generation can bequeath to its successors what it doesn’t have.

I can’t give them an inheritance of hundreds of thousands of dollars if I don’t have it, I can’t give them loyalty. I can’t bequeath to them loyalty. If I haven’t been loyal. I can’t bequeath to them and give them that inheritance of love and respect if I don’t show it every day. They will not have it in them because I will have modeled for them the opposite. I can’t give them self-control or reliance, that indwelled focus of energy. Whatever I’ve got is what they’re going to have, and whatever I can’t give them, they’re going to have to get from someplace else or someone else if I don’t do it.

This is something for us all to think about from time to time: you cannot give what you don’t have. An empty vessel cannot give out anything. That’s one of the reasons I read so many books on leadership and so many different things. I’m studying and trying to grow to be a better person myself so that I can give more to our team and our team leaders, and so they can give more to you. It’s really important that we all recognize that place.

As much as you are full, you can flow and let it flow from you into the lives of those around you.

When you think about your relationship with your kids or your spouse, you can’t expect anything from them that you’re not giving them. Sometimes that might hit. If you feel like I just punched you in the face, trust me, I’m punching myself in the face sometimes too. I get it. I can’t give to my wife or expect from her anything I’m not already giving her. If I’m giving her grief and she’s giving me grief, it seems like it.

Sometimes we need to be the bigger person. If they’re giving you grief, you give them loyalty and love instead and watch them turn, watch them change. I’ve seen it happen in my life. I’ve seen my wife be very generous and kind to me. And it’s changed me. I’ve seen the same reaction happen on the other side where I have moved the needle through love and respect as opposed to moving the needle by yelling and screaming and being stupid.

These are good words, good advice for all of us. It’s the same way with what we read in “Verbal Judo,” the same kind of stuff—how to appreciate and how to show people a little bit more kindness. George Thompson talked about it in “Verbal Judo”: how you talk to a customer, how you talk to a client, how you talk to homeless Harry on the street or transient Tom. How do you speak with them? How do you communicate with them? Our guys in Rise to Care are learning this in and out, day by day, how they relate to people. They can move the needle that much more out there on the street through that love, that respect, that generosity, that listening ear. They’re able to help that person that much faster, that much easier, because you can’t do much else.

That is what we need to do with each other amongst our team and our community—the people around us.

We have so many talking heads. We’re coming into a pretty tough election year, both nationally and probably even politically here locally. But let’s not get caught up on Facebook and social media and shout down the other side because they won’t hear what we have to say by us shouting. It doesn’t do a lot of good on Facebook and social media to even argue anyway, so you might just want to spend less time even paying attention to any of that, to be honest.

As you’re moving forward, remember, you can’t give anything you don’t have. If you want to give something to your generation beyond you. To the friends and family around you, then you have to fill yourself up with it so that you can pour it out. If you want to give love, fill yourself up with love. If you want to fill yourself up with self-discipline so that you can show self-discipline so that others will catch it, then do that.

Have a wonderful week, guys. God bless you. Remember, we can’t do anything if we’re not valuable, so let’s be valuable, because nothing less will do. Let’s think about these things. Our core values matter. Fill yourself up with a little bit of transparency, a little bit of investment, a little bit of value and humility. Fill that bank up and then let it flow from you into the lives of others and watch it change them too. Watch them become more loyal, watch them become more humble, watch them become more transparent, watch them become more invested, because it’s flowing straight from the stream, straight from you.

All right, God bless you guys. I’ll see you next week.